Thursday 11 October 2012

Vindication to vilification

I've just finished my first stint of temporary work away from home, coming back on the train at the weekend. It wasn't the best situation, a lot of travelling and not much of a weekend, and spending your evenings in a stray town...but it worked out ok.

I think the most important thing I got was the feedback from the client. There are skills I think I have that make me perfect for this type of work, and the client pretty much named them all when I was finishing up as a reason for why they liked me working there. I enjoyed the work, and the people were good too. They were social and we always went out together at lunchtime. It was good just being in a normal company around normal people again. It gave my confidence a boost too to hear the client say how happy they were with my work.

I had my next piece of work lined up before I finished my last so I knew I'd only have two weeks off in between. I was hoping it would alleviate the anxiety I had between jobs the last time, but it simply replaced one anxiety with another...I had a lot of things to sort out so it has made my time off feel a bit rushed. I also failed to stop descending into quite a negative life pattern. With nothing really to fill the days, and no routine, I just swam around in alcohol. I was a bit more structured last time, but no gym, no book reading...just trying to fill the day with anything until it became a socially-acceptable time to start drinking, and that time got earlier and earlier each day.

I start my next job soon, and while the endless travel is not something I am looking forward to (or finding a place to stay), I am looking forward to getting back to work. Back to a solid daily routine, as without one I just fall apart.

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